30 going on 17 or 7 (is that gross?)
Every time. I mean every time. I flare up with righteous indignation and I pout and I resolve and I calm, and then I talk to him. Any part of my rehearsed monologue that makes it through ends up sounding spoiled and faithless and silly. And I feel like the brat who whines that someone else got more than she did and everybody's cookies get taken away. I'm left with punch to swallow.
He told me tonight he thinks I'm scared. That's why I can't leave things be. When we sit still among our deeper vibrations I get uncomfortable and bring us back to the superficial. And perhaps, dammit, he's right. The serial monogomist, uncovered.
But still, spontaneous kisses would be nice. Some hint at what might be going on behind those lucious lashes and some affirmation that at least a moment or two is about ME, that would be fantastic. I think of how many tiny joys I've missed opening my mouth to negativity.
He told me tonight he thinks I'm scared. That's why I can't leave things be. When we sit still among our deeper vibrations I get uncomfortable and bring us back to the superficial. And perhaps, dammit, he's right. The serial monogomist, uncovered.
But still, spontaneous kisses would be nice. Some hint at what might be going on behind those lucious lashes and some affirmation that at least a moment or two is about ME, that would be fantastic. I think of how many tiny joys I've missed opening my mouth to negativity.
posted by greenthnkng @ 11:32 PM
1 Comments:
At 1:33 PM,
Michelle Puckett said…
honey, i'm cool with u looking at ur own shit, so way to go on that one, but there isn't a thing wrong with wanting what u want, so don't get it twisted. u have the right to have expectations. xo.
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